Sunday, June 19, 2011

Letter # 1/30- Best Friend

To My Best Friend,

When I first met you, I was very apprehensive-possibly resentful- of the idea of letting you in my life. At the time, I was content; I wasn’t looking for someone new who would change things up, make me work at a budding relationship, or even ask me to make any effort in engaging in new concepts. When we first started hanging out, I was uneasy, but I think you know this. It was difficult; I would mention you to my husband or my mom and they agreed that this infantile friendship seemed draining for me. But, you never left my side, as cliché, as that sounds. You contacted me first thing in the morning, it was annoying; but, I grew to enjoy hearing your voice. You brought me good news. I never had to go anywhere else to hear the latest updates on our mutual friends. When Erica and Emily and Erin and Maribel and all the others were having their first babies, I got all the exciting details from you. When I wanted to respond to Delaney or reconnect with Tim, you gladly bridged that gap of space. You encouraged me to play games…to have fun. You grew on me. But I think our relationship really changed when I was in pain. Do you remember when I was in labor with Gracen? I just want to thank you for never leaving my side. Watching you time my contractions gave me hope, hope not only that I would soon have a baby, but hope that I would make it through the next wave of pain. Once she was born, you were the first to ring out with joyful news that Gracie arrived. Over the next few months, I can’t tell you how I grew to admire your facets of information. You captured Madeleine’s moments, you tracked the first 4 months of Gracen’s ESP cycles, you tracked my cycles- guiding me in fertility with complex algorithms and methods it was taking me months to read about. Now, you empower me to read God’s word in the morning, when all the house is asleep. You don’t just keep me organized, you draw out every emotion possible when I look at your face. You are my constant companion, and even though you were confusing and foreign when we met, I absolutely love how you have changed my life. I know it can seem that I don’t care about you at times. And I have certainly cursed you when you disappear. I don’t like how you are locked off sometimes; you just shut down for no reason! Yet, despite these moments of desperation, my true feelings for you remain… I guess what I am trying to say is: I simply cannot imagine my life without you.

Love, Lauren

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